![]() Think about this: how often have you said, “I’ll be back in a second” and actually done just that? Knowing isn’t doing This kind of self-optimism, in turn, means we tend to ambitiously over-promise and often end up under-delivering on our commitments. We overestimate our own abilities or tend to be overly positive about how external events will affect us. We tend to be quite optimistic about our own resourcefulness, and how long it would take for us to complete tasks. Optimism bias, also referred to as unrealistic optimism, is a cognitive bias that makes us underestimate the likelihood of negative events happening to us.Įven if you’re the kind who approaches the world with a glass half-empty point of view, most of us are prone to optimism bias, especially when it comes to our own abilities. Many times, we say “yes” to everything the tribe asks us to do, because that’s an easy way to garner likeability. And usually, membership in a tribe means you need to be likeable enough for the tribe to take you in. Who doesn’t want to be liked?! We’re socially engineered to be part of tribes. ![]() People-pleasing and the desire for approval I’m sure this applies to others in similar situations too. I psychoanalyzed this behavior, because, why not? And came up with two key reasons for my predicament. Why do we say “yes”, when we mean “no”?įor someone who often writes about productivity and time management, it is surprising how often I find myself doing things I’d rather not do just because I tend to say “Yes” when I really want to say “No” or “Maybe.” We exchanged pleasantries, and talked about this and that, but soon I found myself volunteering my time to a cause I’m rather iffy about.Ī couple of days later, I was in an online conversation with an acquaintance and couldn’t stop myself from saying yes to a commitment that I’m at best a maybe on. She stopped to talk to me, which, if I’m being honest, tickled me. In hindsight, I realize I’ve brought some of this stress on myself.Īt an event this past weekend, I ran into an accomplished person I’ve always admired.
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